I wish this article could be titled the most pathetic thing
I did, singular, but unfortunately I did two pathetic things, plural. Today, I give you pathetic thing number
one.
The first few days after my ex-husband left, I lived under
the delusion that our separation was only temporary; that he would come to his
senses and come home with his tail between his legs.
Even in the midst of ugly things like separations, life does
go on. Winter was upon us. It was Christmas after all. My ex got the snow tires
put on our car (we only owned one vehicle at the time) then dropped the summer
tires off at the house to be stored over the winter. It wasn’t like I could say
no – he was living out of garbage bags in his mom’s basement. He had nowhere
else to put them. Plus I still thought I wanted him to come home so I played
nice.
But housing the tires is not what I qualify as my sad, desperate
move.
Anyone who knows anything about performance brakes and
expensive alloy rims knows that the brake dust attaches itself to the wheels
faster than barnacles grow on the bottom of ocean liners. The black dust is a
constant battle, not to mention a constant reminder that your brakes are
getting used and only getting worse, but I digress, I am moving off topic. Brake
dust is not only unsightly, but it is also corrosive and can do serious damage
to rims. There are entire lines of cleaning products dedicated to the removal
of the offending brake dust. We probably spent more on rim cleaners than I
spent on home cleaning products.
So my ex dropped off the summer rims, informing me that they
were still dirty. He instructed me to clean them, as he didn’t have time to do
it himself, and drove off before I could come to my senses enough to argue him
on it.
Staring at four tires, each wrapped in its own garbage bag,
I debated with myself – to wash them, or not wash them, that was the question.
What did I do?
I washed them.
Wheels and rims are heavy. My garage was cold. My hands
froze. My jacket got dirty. I cried, hating myself every minute of the process.
I guess the problem was I did this for me. I did it so he
could see that he could still rely on me, and for that reason, it could actually
be seen as a selfish action. I also did it because I am cheap. I did not want
to be buying new rims in the New Year. Sigh…
To be continued...
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